Khabib to Senate: “I LIKE BEAR.”

Washington, DC – On Wednesday, UFC Lightweight Champion Khabib Nurmagomedov testified before the U.S. Senate, responding to questions about the melee that followed his victory over Conor McGregor. Today’s discussion primarily centered around the fighter’s adolescence, and his history with bear during that period of his life. Islamica News has obtained a transcript of the […]

Facebook Unveils ‘Start Civil War’ Feature To Address Current Political Crisis

Menlo Park, CA – Starting Wednesday, all 2.3 billion Facebook users will be able to declare civil war on one another based on their proximity and interests. CEO Mark Zuckerberg unveiled the new feature at a developer conference in San Francisco earlier this week, and is part of an ongoing response by the social media giant to […]

DON’T BE DISTRACTED. The Real Story Here is That There’s a Habib With a Freakin ‘K’ in His Name

The following is an editorial written by Habib Ali whose views and opinions are his own and do not reflect the viewpoints of Islamica News. Yo guys, it’s me, Habib Ali – your thirty-something, brown, slightly attention-deficit friend. Need your help in walking me through one of my many mental dilemmas. And no it’s not […]

President Trump Assures Iftar Guests: Dinner and Waterboarding Will Start After Sunset

Washington, DC – Wednesday evening, at an Iftar dinner hosted by the White House, President Trump and CIA Director Gina Haspel assured all guests that dinner and waterboarding would not start until after sunset. Per the Islamic tradition, Muslims are required to abstain from food and drink between sunrise and sunset during the holy month […]